Ant and Matt. Photo courtesy of Photos by Zoe
I got this question from a lovely man via Instagram the other day:
"What do two men typically do with rings? Do they both do an engagement and wedding ring, or are the engagement rings typically used as the wedding rings? Also do both people wear the engagement ring?"
I loved it! One, because it opened up a wonderful discussion about the infinite possibilities of two hands and up to 6 rings. And two, because I've also wanted to be an advice columnist and I'm pretty sure this is as close I'll ever get.
Turns out, I know a thing or two about jewelry, but I'm not a gay man, so I had some reckons but thought it was probably best to do some crowd-sourcing for information and ideas. Which, holy-kajole, I got such amazing, lovely, kind and inspiring stories from our community.
I wanted to use every, single photo from Ant and Matt's wedding. I also want to go back to school, become a Dr. and re-do mine and Ash's wedding. Photo courtesy of Photos by Zoe
First up, my reckons. When it comes to anything and everything wedding-related, I'm a firm believer that there's no reason to be bound by any sort of rule or tradition, especially when it comes to rings. Want to mix your metals? Go for it! Feeling left out because you gave an engagement ring, but didn't get one yourself, YOU SHOULD TOTALLY BUY YOURSELF AN ENGAGEMENT RING TOO!
I think our asymmetrical facets ring makes an excellent engagement ring.
The more rings the better (says the lady that earns a living selling rings). So, my answer is yes! Gay men do wear engagement rings. Turns out, so do straight men. And it's fine to stack an engagement ring with a wedding ring on the same finger no matter where you fall on the gender spectrum. The idea that jewelry choices have anything to do with gender is just ridiculous.
A perfect, subtle engagement and wedding ring stack.
I also suggest that you can wear an engagement ring on one hand and a wedding ring on the other. We have lots of people that do that. Or just use one ring for both engagement and wedding ring. So many options. All of them good.
Now, the best bit! Here's what we heard from our crew (aka our Instagram Followers)
First up from Kristi:
"As a lesbian couple..it kinda relates, but a little different - as 2 women I thought as me being the one proposing I would get 2 rings, a beautiful diamond ring for my fiancé and I didn't want to miss out on a putting a ring on to celebrate our occasion, so I ordered myself a ring too!! Why not I say!! And I think men could do exactly the same!!"
And this from Holly:
"So my fiancé is not gay, but I got him an engagement ring (from y'all) because we view our relationship as equals & that was just as important for him to have something to signify that we had taken the next step in our relationship."
This is the look of love you get when you're in a couple where you recognise that you're equals and thus equally deserve an engagement ring. You guys are badass! Photo courtesy of KJ Jugar
And finally, from Ant, he went with both an engagement and wedding ring and rocks a stack:
"I will say that I did not want a massive diamond, but did want it to be a diamond ring. So the ring with the trees and night sky worked perfectly."
You can find The Snow on Pines ring here:
And finally, I think everyone deserves a giant diamond ring if that's what they want. I've never seen a hand that didn't look spectacular with a classic solitaire hanging out on the ring finger.