I got this question from a lovely man via Instagram the other day:
What do two men typically do with rings? Do they both do an engagement and wedding ring, or are the engagment rigns typically used as the wedding rings? Also do both people wear the engagement ring?
I loved it! One, because it opened up a wonderful discussion about the infinite possibilities of two hands and up to 6 rings. And two, because I've also wanted to be an advice columnist and I'm pretty sure this is as close I'll ever get. I realize I'm using very binary terms, hopefully, my point that rings are for everyone and that there are no rules comes through loud and clear.
Turns out, I know a thing or two about jewelry, but I'm not a gay man, so I had some reckons but thought it was probably best to do some crowd-sourcing for information and ideas. Which, holy-kajole, I got such amazing, lovely, kind and inspiring stories from our community.
First up, my reckons. When it comes to anything and everything wedding-related, I'm a firm believer that there's no reason to be bound by any sort of rule or tradition, especially when it comes to rings. Want to mix your metals? Go for it! Feeling left out because you gave an engagement ring, but didn't get one yourself, YOU SHOULD TOTALLY BUY YOURSELF AN ENGAGEMENT RING TOO!
The more rings the better (says the lady that earns a living selling rings). So, my answer is yes! Gay men do wear engagement rings. Turns out, so do straight men. Also, men can stack a wedding ring with their engagement ring, that's fine by me. It's stupid that women have cornered the marked on getting to wear multiple rings on one finger.
I also suggest that you can wear an engagement ring on one hand and a wedding ring on the other. We have lots of people that do that. Or just use one ring for both engagement and wedding ring. So many options. All of them good.
Now, the best bit here's what we heard from our crew (aka our Instagram Followers)
First up from Kristi:
"As a lesbian couple..it kinda relates, but a little different - as 2 women I thought as me being the one proposing I would get 2 rings, a beautiful diamond ring for my fiancé and I didn't want to miss out on a putting a ring on to celebrate our occasion, so I ordered myself a ring too!! Why not I say!! And I think men could do exactly the same!!"
And this from Holly:
"So my fiancé is not gay, but I got him an engagement ring (from y'all) because we view our relationship as equals & that was just as important for him to have something to signify that we had taken the next step in our relationship."
And finally, from Ant, he and his partner went with both:
"I will say that I did not want a massive diamond, but did want it to be a diamond ring. So the ring with the trees and night sky worked perfectly."